Skip to main content

Day 50 - How was your day?

What am I even trying to say today?

A ramble, that's what I'm trying to say. A rush of words after a very long day. Thoughts and words that are not organized at all.

A 12-hour day is too long. Why was my nephew naked this morning when I got to their house? Taylor Swift and Bad Bunny make for a good playlist for me. Geeks shouldn't give presentations. My shoes were the wrong choice for today. Is Seth Meyers wearing a new shirt?

But what I'm actually thinking about is how I've been taking some risks lately in trusting people. That makes it sound dramatic, but what I actually mean is that I'm trying to get to know some people around me better, and that requires being vulnerable.

It meant taking a chance on texting someone who was in the most boring meeting of all time with me with some snark, and hoping I judged them correctly (I did). I reached out to a new work friend, and the work group chat, about my stress levels, and was met with empathy and assistance. I texted an old friend about some of my less-than-stellar moments in my 20s, and got humor, understanding, and some much-deserved judgement. It's asking The Council why Poppy is peeing in the house, and desperately hoping for some wisdom.

I tried to not cry in front of my new bosses, and like. Ok, I was less successful on that front, but they didn't seem to judge me, so let's call that a win. I'm also slowly letting out pieces of my personality, like my playlists (see above) and telling them "If New York State wants to complain about your 2024 taxes now, they can wait 3 more days for me to call them back." Not sure what was so funny, really. I thought it was pretty logical.

If you're reading this, please pray for the new coworkers, bosses, and hopefully soon-to-be new friends in my life because only you know what they're getting themselves into - a woman with tear ducts attached to every emotion, intelligence with a solid helping of both sarcasm and self-doubt, and a face that does not have an inside voice.

May the force be with you. (And also with you... in case you grew up Catholic.)

Now, if you'll excuse me, it's probably time for bed so I can have a restful 10-hour day tomorrow.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Day 66 - Revelation

I’m not sure what triggered the conversations. I talked to 3 women last week who had all been diagnosed with ADHD late in life. One of them was my sister, and that’s important, because guess what ADHD has? A strong hereditary link. The other two were girlfriends - very different careers. Children at very different stages of their life. Different ages for their diagnosis. And while the wording was different, the message was the same - probably time for you to get evaluated. Actually, I think when I told my sister “I think I have ADHD,” her reply was something close to “no fucking shit.” You know, lovingly. There’s an episode of How I Met Your Mother where the sound of glass shattering plays whenever someone notices an annoying habit of one of the other characters. I tend to hear it in my head when I feel a lightbulb moment, and this past week has been nothing but glass shattering in my head. Why did I stay up until 1am in high school to type out my chemistry labs when no one else was do...
Post a Comment
Read more

Day 120 - Dessert

I'm feeling a little off today. Not just because I'm still dealing with the congestion from whatever this sickness was from over the weekend, but because I'm still unemployed. I think I just don't know what to do next. I had an interview yesterday for a departmental supervisor at a local store, but it didn't go great. I was very out of practice for the interview, which was a surprise to me, and the interview was weird. It was clear that the interviewer had a script that needed to be read and answered in order. None of my jokes landed, and they were funny. I'm funny! Or at least witty. And when I asked some follow-up questions about one of their questions, they didn't have an answer for me. It made me question if I even want this job, and that's the first time that's happened so far this job search. I've also only had 4 interviews (out of 80+ applications), so I guess I haven't had a lot of say in what position is right for me. Today, I was, a...
Post a Comment
Read more

Day 1 - here I go again

In first or second grade, I found a book in the school library of rhymes and old wives' tales about weather predictions. It was things like "Red sky at night, sailor's delight.” I was hooked. From that point on, I wanted to study the weather. In second grade, I begged my teacher to let me do the weather report for the classroom at least once a week. I was obsessed with a book about how to conserve water. I studied maps, and went to Lake Ontario with Dad to look for waterspouts (I'm embarrassed to say that despite the fact I've spent most of my life on the Great Lakes, I still haven't seen one.) In 4th grade, the dad of one of my classmates worked in the control tower of our airport. This was pre-2001, so he arranged a tour for the class. We got to see some pretty cool things and overheard pilots talking. This drew me in, and by the time I watched a special about the Hartsfield-Jackson airport in Atlanta with my dad, I was so sure I would work at an airport. In ...
Post a Comment
Read more